On May 11th, Harrison Butker, kicker for the Kansas City Chiefs, gave the commencement address to the graduating class of 2024 at Benedictine College, a small Catholic liberal arts school in Atchison, Kansas.

Normally, a speech of this kind would not be noticed by anyone other than the attendees – however, Harrison made some statements that immediately began spreading like wildfire, some of them seeming so outlandish for a graduation address that I honestly didn’t believe them when first I heard.

Surely, I thought, he didn’t really stand before women who were receiving the diplomas they had worked diligently for and tell them he was certain they were most interested in being homemakers, that their lives wouldn’t truly begin until they were wives and mothers?

He could not have said this at a graduation. . . right?

As I was pondering, I decided to go straight to the source before I really let myself get worked up – National Catholic Register shared the full transcript of his speech.

National Catholic Register Butker Speech Transcript.

Well, turns out he did say it – and many other things as well.

(Today, we’re just going to look at his comments to the women in the graduating class, for if we looked at the whole of it, I would be writing a dissertation or perhaps a series.)

The portion of the speech in question:

For the ladies present today, congratulations on an amazing accomplishment. You should be proud of all that you have achieved to this point in your young lives. I want to speak directly to you briefly because I think it is you, the women, who have had the most diabolical lies told to you. How many of you are sitting here now about to cross this stage and are thinking about all the promotions and titles you are going to get in your career? Some of you may go on to lead successful careers in the world, but I would venture to guess that the majority of you are most excited about your marriage and the children you will bring into this world.

I can tell you that my beautiful wife, Isabelle, would be the first to say that her life truly started when she began living her vocation as a wife and as a mother. I’m on the stage today and able to be the man I am because I have a wife who leans into her vocation. I’m beyond blessed with the many talents God has given me, but it cannot be overstated that all of my success is made possible because a girl I met in band class back in middle school would convert to the faith, become my wife, and embrace one of the most important titles of all: homemaker.

She is a primary educator to our children. She is the one who ensures I never let football or my business become a distraction from that of a husband and father. She is the person that knows me best at my core, and it is through our marriage that, Lord willing, we will both attain salvation. 

I say all of this to you because I have seen it firsthand how much happier someone can be when they disregard the outside noise and move closer and closer to God’s will in their life. Isabelle’s dream of having a career might not have come true, but if you asked her today if she has any regrets on her decision, she would laugh out loud, without hesitation, and say, “Heck, No.”

– Harrison Butker, Benedictine College, May 11, 2024

First, as many of you who are regular readers know, I am blessed to be an at-home wife to the most wonderful husband, having given up working outside our home in 2017 when my health failed, and now writing and staying home with Henry Petunia. That said, this is certainly not to rail against being a homemaker or to in any way detract from the importance of stay-at-home mothers either for that matter.

It is always, always about a woman’s choice either way. ❤

There are several issues however, not so much even with what Harrison says – he is certainly entitled to his thoughts – but where he has chosen to express them.

First, after cursorily complementing the female graduates on their accomplishments, he presumes that the “majority” of them are most excited about becoming wives and mothers – on the day they are being recognized for their academic achievements.

He immediately follows that statement by saying that his wife’s life “did not begin” until she was a wife and mother – as if she were not a whole person on her own, a profoundly dismissive thought.

He goes on to say many things about his wife that I’m sure to his mind are highest praise – in saying he couldn’t be the (presumably great) man he is without her – but it is one last thing he says about her that really caught my eye, when he mentions that her “dream of having a career might not have come true.”

His wife is 30 years old – and, when I looked her up, she had a double major in Spanish and Computer Science herself. Lord willing, she still has much life ahead of her to decide which dreams will and won’t come true – whether or not she has come to that realization yet.

As for the women who got the fuzzy end of the lollipop that was Harrison Butker as graduation speaker, I am deeply offended for them, as they deserved so much better on a momentous day in their lives.

The Benedictine Sisters of Mt. Scholastica, the nuns affiliated with the college, issued a statement regarding with Butker’s address as well: “Instead of promoting unity in our church, our nation, and the world, his comments seem to have fostered division. One of our concerns was the assertion that being a homemaker is the highest calling for a woman. We sisters have dedicated our lives to God and God’s people, including the many women whom we have taught and influenced during the past 160 years. These women have made a tremendous difference in the world in their roles as wives and mothers and through their God-given gifts in leadership, scholarship, and their careers.”

NPR Nuns Statement Regarding Butker Address.

As this has been on my mind and heart, there has been something else that I couldn’t quite express about Mr. Butker’s posture towards women, something I couldn’t give words to, how much more it bothers me that he has wrapped it in a language of faith – and I saw it expressed perfectly today, by Rev. Benjamin Cremer:

Jesus performed his first miracle – sooner than He planned – at the behest of His mother.

Jesus healed the woman with the issue of blood – openly.

Jesus talked to the Samaritan woman at the well – in the middle of day.

Jesus had many female followers during a time when men didn’t speak to women in public.

Jesus spared the woman caught in adultery – in a crowd.

Jesus was attended at the Cross by the Three Mary’s and the Apostle John when others had fled.

Jesus first revealed himself post-Resurrection to Mary Magdalene.

Jesus valued women, equally. ❤

Be well, everybody. Take care of yourselves and each other.

Grace and Blessings.