giving rescue.

You are not hidden
There’s never been a moment
You were forgotten
You are not hopeless
Though you have been broken
Your innocence stolen

I hear you whisper underneath your breath
I hear your SOS, your SOS

I will send out an army to find you
In the middle of the darkest night
It’s true, I will rescue you

There is no distance
That cannot be covered
Over and over
You’re not defenseless
I’ll be your shelter
I’ll be your armor

I hear you whisper underneath your breath
I hear your SOS, your SOS

I will send out an army to find you
In the middle of the darkest night
It’s true, I will rescue you
I will never stop marching to reach you
In the middle of the hardest fight
It’s true, I will rescue you. – Rescue, Lauren Daigle.

I’ve started this post several times – and written a couple of them at length – and then had to stop.

The situation that has prompted it – and the response by some to it – has REALLY upset me.

Still, I’ve decided to try again as the subject matter is so important and just keep it simple.

Over the weekend, the news broke that Jay Barker, former University of Alabama quarterback, was charged with felony assault with a deadly weapon for attempting to hit his soon to be ex-wife with his car. This came as a total shock to many of us in my area, as he has carefully cultivated a squeaky clean Christian image for some thirty years now – but, of course, people can change and we only know the public persona.

As this was published by many local news outlets, I made the mistake of reading the comment sections and – since he was a local football hero, having won a national championship when he played for the University – there were some appropriate comments, but also many along the lines of “he would never” and even “why did she need to call the police?”

That’s right. Apparently, since he “missed” smashing into her at a high rate of speed (per several witnesses), she should have just let that go – and waited to see what was coming next. (Of note, the police intercepted him when he was coming BACK by her house for some reason. Hmmm.)

We don’t know the full story – but I do know that the next day, he felt the need to post some scripture on his Instagram, to remind his faithful to pray for his family. Gaslighting much?

I’m not going to get into a full recap of the situation – because it infuriates me – but here is a link to an article if you are unfamiliar before we go on:

Sara Evans filed for divorce prior to Jay Barker’s arrest for attempting to run over her with a vehicle

As I write to you, I am recalling having written a lengthy post about domestic violence almost two years ago related to the precious Watts family – Shanann, Bella, Celeste, and Niko – who were murdered by husband and father, Chris, another “wonderful family man.”

https://autoimmunehippie.blog/2019/04/10/shanann-bella-celeste-and-niko-and-saving-others-from-violence/

Situations like this again with Jay Barker remind us that we don’t know what may be happening right in front of us or next door and there are things we need to be aware of – even with the “nicest” of families.

Per the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence:

  • 1 in 3 women and 1 in 14 men experience some type of intimate partner physical violence in their lifetime.
  • For 1 in 4 women and 1 in 7 men, this violence is severe in nature.
  • Every minute, 20 people are abused by an intimate partner in the United States.
  • 1 in 7 women and 1 in 18 men have experienced stalking to the point they were fearful for their safety.
  • Domestic violence hotlines receive more than 20.000 calls per day.
  • It is thought that only 34% of those injured by an intimate partner receive medical treatment.

Please also be aware that often a person who has decided to leave an abusive situation is in even more danger in the period immediately after they have left.

(For example, with the Barker situation, reports indicate he was refusing to cooperate with divorce proceedings for six months and she had requested that a judge grant her motion for divorce. He then appeared at her home – when he lives two and a half hours away. Frightening, to say the least.)

If you suspect someone is in a dangerous situation, though it is difficult, it is important to express your concerns. It can be a matter of life and death.

Where a safety plan is suggested, here is a template that might be helpful for anyone who is in such an awful situation.

Additionally, here is my resources tab with numerous contact lines and websites for victims of abuse as well as those dealing with substance abuse and mental health issues. It is meant to be helpful to many difficult situations:

https://autoimmunehippie.blog/resources/

As always, if you see something say something. Let’s give rescue whenever we can.

Be well, everybody. Take care of yourselves and each other.

Grace and Blessings.

3 comments

  1. Such a powerful post!!! I too will help any women and even man who is experiencing domestic abuse. You may not know it, but your post has probably touched the right eyes even though you may not know it. As someone that has been in a verbally and physically abusive situation in my youth, it takes courage to ask for help or admitting that you are being abused. I saw Sarah Evans a few years ago and she is such strong lady, she told us the story about her falling down an escalator and injuring her ankle earlier in the morning. Had she not told us, we would have never known she was hurting…makes me think…

    Like

    • It’s so scary. My heart hurts for her – and anyone facing such awful circumstances! I’ve been there as well in my younger days and it’s the most terrible, lonely place. 💔

      Like

  2. My heart hurts for her as well. I wish that you and I did not share those younger day issues, it really is lonely, I had never really thought of it that way, just dark.

    Be well and have a lovely day.

    Michelle

    Like

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