leaning in to our true Hope.

After posting about an intense and drawn out CRPS flare that finally seemed to be winding down last week, on Saturday I had a good day.

In fact, owing to nothing short of an early Christmas miracle, my Bullies even won.

I went to bed tired and sore – but feeling as well as I had in recent weeks.

However, as I often say with the Spoonie life – particularly when one has multiple diagnoses, things can change without warning – and within minutes.

I woke up at 4 AM Sunday morning, in screaming pain, burning up with a 102 degree fever, barely able to walk to my bathroom, crying trying to get there, with a heart rate over 140.

I was so disoriented at first that I was honestly very worried about COVID.

Finally, when I got my wits about me and fully assessed the situation, I realized I was dealing with the first RA flare I’ve dealt with in sometime.

I guess I shouldn’t have been so sure it was under control. Ugh.

I immediately started loading Tylenol, beta blockers, and steroids – and my body was totally haywire all day Sunday.

I kept just falling into my total collapses – where I’m just OUT, even if I’m sitting up.

My temp has come down some, though I still have a fever, and I have JUST gotten my heart rate to 98 now. My Fitbit actually thought I RAN an hour in my sleep in terms of my heart rate yesterday.

In terms of the pain and the joints affected, the worst of it is definitely my left hip and then radiating down my left leg and also my right hand. My feet are extremely angry and burning as well.

Such is the Spoonie life.

However, in the midst of this. . .

Yesterday, we lit the fourth candle of Advent.

Stewart the Giving Bear came in the mail from my precious Tonya, a lovely gift from an even more lovely and wonderful friend. 💚

I began the process of writing a devotional for spoonies that will be out next Summer. To say that my heart is overflowing doesn’t begin to describe my feelings.

It’s CHRISTMAS week!!! 💚💚💚

Though it DOES look different this year – and I, the Christmas queen, have sent cards out later than EVER due to illness after illness – I will call and FaceTime and text and pray over those we can’t be with.

Then, on Christmas Eve, here in the Hippie Hut, we will join our church family online and light the Christ candle and then will watch A Christmas Story and have Santa and snacks and just BE together.

And Christmas morning we will have stockings and do more of the same.

Especially after this crazy year, all in the world I want for Christmas is this.

So, as we all come into this Christmas maybe a bit extra weary this year, let’s celebrate big and love hard and give thanks for our true and living Hope.