feeling small.

we are frail, we are fearfully and wonderfully made

forged in the fires of human passions, choking on the fumes of selfish rage

and, with these our hells and our heavens, so few inches apart

we must be awfully small

and not as strong as we think we are.

– rich mullins


We had a fabulous day visiting our precious family yesterday.

9 23 2
Henry LOVES to visit his grandparents. 🙂

On the way home, I learned that our older daughter has completely gone off the rails again – and, as an “adult” at 18, there is nothing I can do about it.

Needless to say, we are just beyond upset.

However, I was incredibly RA sick yesterday and still am today – in terms of feet so tender I can barely walk and a hip that is just beyond all sense. Because I haven’t been this sick before (this child always has spectacular timing), I have to really focus on not letting this situation escalate with my health due to the stress with her.

In addition to that, our younger daughter’s DNA allergy testing came in – and she is incredibly allergic to many things. I will do an entire post on that soon – particularly how it may impact her autoimmune disease and what we are doing to help her – but, in the now, the most frightening thing it uncovered was a nut allergy.

If you aren’t aware, those can lie dormant essentially, and then became an anaphylactic response. So she needs to avoid nuts from now on. And I am just feeling a strong need to protect her – of course.

Food allergies, of which we have plenty, are serious business:

28 Things People With Food Allergies Wish You Knew

And I am just feeling small.

And a bit overwhelmed.

But I know God’s got this when I don’t.

So, for today, I am going to first go to church – which I am so looking forward to (and I am going to be grateful for online service today).

Then I am going to enjoy the Saints game with my husband and Henry the Wonderpup.

And I am going to do some Paleo cooking – with my new Instant Pot! – and eat some delicious, nutritious food.

And after that? Studying and naps and maybe a nice hot bath too.

It’s time for some serious self-care to stop this insane flare and also some quality time with – and extra care and nutrition and loving on for – my younger daughter who is also flaring and very upset about her sister acting a fool as well. We will be sticking even closer than usual this week.

And I am so thankful I already had a bestie date coming up. It is so needed.

I also plan to have the BEST date night with my better half this week. It will probably be dinner on the couch and an Amazon movie – and that will be fantastic. He is my rock in this craziness and we are so overdue.

I’m feeling small – but I am so thankful that I am not alone.

This from Bob Goff. I am blessed.

Be well, everybody.

Grace and Blessings.






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