lions and tigers and flares, oh my! (and falls and gnarly injuries too)

(So often I want to write about things other than autoimmune disease and spoonie life – but I also think it’s important to share just how delicate our chronically ill ecosystems are. Life starts happening, with the bad things everyone has to walk through sometimes, then our spoonie bodies respond with symptoms, then those snowball, then we are less able to physically handle anything else that might come our way. It can take us from relatively stable to really ill in the blink of an eye. And here I am. . .) 

As I wrote last week, we experienced several devastating losses, one that was particularly sudden and shocking and another that has been so hard on my family, especially my precious parents.

With these, my anxiety has been worse than usual and I have been having difficulty sleeping in a regular way – not that my sleep is ever good, but it has been much worse.

Of course, with RA and CRPS, anxiety, lack of sleep, and general upset all come together to bring on symptoms of a flare – and, by last Friday, I was having body pain and extreme fatigue and the awful facial pain that is characteristic of my CRPS really beginning to act up. As my better half and I were having our Friday night date night, I just felt awful and needed to come rest – but I was hopeful I would actually be able to sleep and feel better for Gameday Saturday.

As I was getting ready for bed, our sweet Sara Bug took Henry outside. Shortly thereafter, she returned just beyond upset with Henry shaking like a leaf. He had been. . . pounced? trampled? jumped?. . . suddenly by a neighbor’s TWO full-grown pitbulls, who thankfully were not biting him – but still were all over him and their owner was having difficulty removing them.

Henry was not injured – but it was awful.

Needless to say, our whole household was in an uproar at that point. We ended up at McDonald’s – and y’all know this little holistic nutritionist NEVER eats that stuff – for some kid comfort food of McD’s fries and Diet Coke for the two-legged people and tiny ice cream for the four-legged people. And, again, I was awake most of the night, watching our baby and hanging on to my Valor bottle like it was the Elixir of Life.


He rested through the night and Saturday was Gameday.

Well. . . bless, Henry doesn’t get into anything generally – because running and whatnot are really not his jam 😉 – but, of all days, he had an accident getting on the bed and broke a claw. It bled, it was painful for him, his mother almost dropped her basket. . . Oh my word.

Thank goodness, especially as the vet’s office was already closed, Daddy was home to give rescue and he got us all put back together. . .

Finally, already flare-ish and with two days of Henry having A. Time. – it’s so much worse when things happen to him! – we did spend Saturday afternoon watching the games with Daddy, then had to just collapse for awhile.

By Sunday and Monday, my body was just . . . angry. . . and I knew I was going to have to rest and perhaps call my Rheumy to increase my steriods – ugh – for a bit (because shots have been off the table with the ongoing pandemic situation – get your vaccines PLEASE, people!).

First, though, we had several things scheduled on Tuesday that had to be done – family doctor’s appointments and whatnot. So, my plan was to push through those then stay in bed for the rest of the week. . .

Well, when I woke up from my allotted few hours of sleep (the CRPS, especially pain in my face, weakness, and fatigue had been escalating – so, again, sleep stinks), my body REALLY did not want to get up. Normally, when it is that bad, I just have to cancel whatever plans I have and stay in bed. However, these were necessary appointments, so I got up, to push through.

As I was standing in my closet at about 5AM, without warning, I then passed out cold.

I haven’t had an episode like that in I don’t know when.

Oh my word.

Thankfully, there was actually a vintage box fan behind me so I bumped my head on plastic instead of the floor. Everything else though? Oh my body took a hit.

I am bruised from head to toe – and my CRPS and RA have reacted violently too with my joints and feet swelling like crazy.

These are just a few gems. I am Barney the Purple Dinosaur.

As it happened, my new PCP was able to see me and felt that this was combination of my blood pressure and blood sugar crashing suddenly with this flare so I’ll be going back to continuous blood sugar monitoring. She was also able to give me the injections I have not been able to get in SO long – which is amazing news when I am flaring.

Now the situation I find myself in is that, of course, I’m pretty banged up from the fall – and then trauma like that to my body only makes a flare worse.

Now I’m in the land of crazy body pain and stiffness – of course – and odd sleep – and facial pain and fevers and my lupie rash coming and going and food tasting strange and eye twitches. . .

Good. Grief.

The worst thing I think is the fear it provokes in me – because I’ve had falls trigger a severe flare for months and I’ve had them trigger a mild flare for two weeks – and there is no rhyme or reason as to why.

So, as ordered by my PCP, I am in bed, resting for the time being. I am doing school work, reading, writing, and healing.

I am hanging on and praying and trusting the Lord that this will heal quickly and well and believing for the best. ❤

Be well, everybody. Take care of yourselves and each other.

Grace and Blessings.

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